


Bare your Heart

by DumbassEntity



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Author is trans, Coming Out, Confessions, Dragon Age: Inquisition Quest - Last Resort of Good Men, First Kiss, Fluff, Implied past transphobia, M/M, Trans Inquisitor (Dragon Age)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-06
Updated: 2021-01-06
Packaged: 2021-03-17 04:07:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 920
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28593720
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DumbassEntity/pseuds/DumbassEntity
Summary: "He hated this. Baring one of the more vulnerable parts of himself and trusting that it wouldn’t be broken."---A short, sweet fic about confessions, first kisses, and how much of a hellscape dating is when you're trans and gay.
Relationships: Dorian Pavus/Male Trevelyan, Male Inquisitor/Dorian Pavus
Comments: 3
Kudos: 19





	Bare your Heart

Dorian was uncharacteristically quiet during the return trip from Redcliffe. Caleb had decided against pushing the issue at the time. He could tell Dorian was still sorting through things on his own, and Caleb was content to wait until Dorian was ready to talk about it. So he’d given him time. Offered comfort but demanded no answers. 

Ultimately, he just wanted to help Dorian in any way he could. It broke his heart to see Dorian upset and wounded, but it was then that he realized how much he cared for him. How much he wanted to reach out and just hold him like he deserved. Remind him how much he meant to him.

When he felt like Dorian wanted to talk about what had happened he was there. 

“He says we’re alike,” Dorian said finally, “Too much pride. Once I would have been overjoyed to hear him say that, now I’m not certain. I don’t know if I can forgive him.”

“He really tried to change you?” Caleb asked. 

“Out of desperation.” He explained, “I wouldn’t put on a show, marry the girl, keep everything unsavory private and locked away. Selfish, I suppose. Not to want to spend my entire life screaming on the inside.” 

Not selfish at all, Caleb thought. He knew the feeling of being trapped in an imposed identity like an animal in a cage. Clawing, crying, desperate to be free. Survival isn’t selfish. 

“He was going to do a blood ritual. Alter my mind to make me… acceptable. I found out. I left.”

Caleb still had a thousand questions and thoughts swirling through his head.  _ I understand. I wouldn’t change a thing about you. Your dad is an ass. _

“Are you alright?” he said finally.

“Not really,” Dorian admitted, “Thank you for coming with me, it wasn’t what I expected but… it’s something. Maker knows what you think of me after that whole display.” 

There was a hint of embarrassment that ran through that last part that made something in Caleb break. 

“I don’t think any less of you if that’s what you mean,” he said, “More if possible.”

“The things you say.”

“I mean them all,” Caleb said. 

“My father never understood, living a lie… it festers inside of you. Like a poison,” Dorian said, stepping closer, “You have to fight for what's in your heart.”

“I know,” Caleb breathed. He’d tasted that poison on his own lips before after all. 

Dorian leaned in and kissed Caleb and his heart skipped a beat. He froze for only a moment before melting into the touch. He lost himself momentarily in the intoxication of having Dorian against him and holding him, but the guilt inevitably crept in. 

It was old doubts and insecurities. Memories of past loves. Hurled accusations of lying, deception. Reactions of disgust and confusion. They all clouded his thoughts until he had to break the kiss and pull back.

“Dorian, I’m sorry-” 

“What’s wrong?” Dorian retreated and Caleb felt a pang of loss at his absence. Dorian's eyes were filled with a concern that made Caleb's guts twist.

“Nothing, I just…” Caleb sighed, “I don’t think I can give you what you want.”

“And what exactly do you think I want?” 

A hint of offense, that was worse.

“I… Maker, let me start over. I know that you’re only interested in men-”

“-And? You  _ are _ a man, one I’m  _ very _ interested in.”

“I- look. What _ I  _ am and what most people consider a man are two different things. I…” Caleb paused and steadied himself. He hated this. Baring one of the more vulnerable parts of himself and trusting that it wouldn’t be broken. But Dorian deserved the truth. “I  _ am  _ a man, but my body is likely not what you would expect of one. I was assumed female at birth, but eventually realized I wasn’t. When I insisted on using a more fitting name and expression, my family reacted… poorly. That’s why I had to leave Ostwick.”

Dorian paused for a moment.

“I understand if that changes things-” Caleb began.

“It doesn’t.” 

“Really?” Caleb asked disbelievingly. He knew that it shouldn’t, but what should be and what is are rarely the same.

“Of course not. A few fantasies may need to be adjusted, but that's no matter. I’m not that shallow.”

“I… well that's reassuring. I was halfway certain you’d accuse me of lying to you,” Caleb said with a wince.

“No, no. You’re a terrible liar. I’d know if you were actually trying to deceive me.”

Caleb laughed softly at that. 

Dorian ran a hand through Caleb's hair, before pulling him in for another kiss. Caleb leaned more into it this time. He reveled in the warmth that danced under his skin and pushed against Dorian. He’d almost forgotten what this was like. He lingered for a moment after Dorian pulled back, still a bit reeling from everything that’d just occurred.

“See, just like kissing any other man. Except better, because it’s you.”

Caleb smiled and shook his head, “I’m sorry, I doubted you.”

“No, don’t apologize. People can be terribly closed minded at times. I understand being scared, but I promise you don’t have to be,” Dorian said, lacing his fingers into Caleb's.

Caleb sighed. He was emotionally drained. Hopeful and relieved, but exhausted nonetheless. No matter how many times he’d had to do this, It never got less nerve wracking.

“How about we get a drink,” Dorian suggested, “I think we both deserve it after today.”

“Sounds great,” Caleb said.

**Author's Note:**

> I might repost this as a part of a larger fic later, but I figured this was a nice bite size piece to post fill the trans inquisitor void.   
> If you liked this cute sappy drabble please leave a comment, you have no clue how much they mean to me.


End file.
